Trapped No More


He feels trapped.
Heck, he is trapped. He’s inside some kind of glass box and however hard he tries, he just can’t get out. He tries. He’s been trying for a long time now. A day? A month? He doesn’t know how long he’s been here, but all he wants to do is get out. But he can’t. There’s no door, no exit. He walks left. He walks right. He walks in every direction but always bangs into a wall. It’s dark, but he knows he’s not alone here. There are people around him watching, laughing at his confusion. He can feel their eyes on his back, piercing through his skin. He’s done asking for help. His voice is hoarse from screaming, begging for someone to help him. His cheeks are stained with tears. His hands are sore from banging the walls, his feet cold from the floor beneath him. He’s trapped, unable to come out. His throat constricts and he can feel the tears sting his eyes. He wants to get out. All he wants is to get out. The people outside should let him come out. They put him in there in the first place. He wanted to come out, he needed to come out, but there was only darkness and walls around him. He walked the same small place repeatedly, screaming and crying in vain. Outside the box, people laughed.

At last he gives up and slides down one of the walls. He closes his eyes.
It was never supposed to be like this. I was never supposed to feel trapped. I was never supposed to be trapped.
Tears made their way down his face. His head throbbed and his legs felt numb.
How did I reach here? Who put me here? Why aren’t these people helping me? Did they put me in here? How will I get out? Will I ever come out?
The questions made his head hurt and the tears streamed down his face faster. He brought his knees to his chest and rested his head.

Breathe in. Breathe out.

He was miserable, worse than he’d ever been. And the more miserable he felt, he could hear the people outside laugh even louder. He wondered if they could see him in this pitiful condition. He wondered if he looked as bad as he felt. He probably did. He wondered how cruel people would have to be stay and laugh at someone’s misery. He would never do that. It surprised him. It scared him.

Breathe in. Breathe out.

He thought about all the things that were important to him. He pictured his face, smiling and holding his hand. He imagined him getting down on one knee and asking him to marry him. He imagined their kids. He wanted only two, but he insisted that they have at least 4. He thought about him assuring him that they would be the best parents. He pictured them living happily together.
But then he realized that all of that was not possible if he didn’t come out. He had to get out soon.

I have to get out of this box. I have to. For him… For us.

He slowly began to relax. His breathing slowed. His heart beat came back to normal. He felt strong enough to stand up. He took a deep breath and got up. The laughter outside stopped. He faced the walls and placed his palms on the glass. He heard people outside shift uncomfortably. A small smile played on his lips. He imagined his face, smiling at him and nodding approvingly.
I’m not hiding who I am anymore. He said to no one in particular.
I’m proud of myself and I can’t hide any longer. I don’t want to hide.
He said a bit louder. He felt a cold metal doorknob appear under his left palm. He placed his fingers on it, ready to come out.
I love him, and I’m not afraid to tell the world that. He said firmly with as much courage as he could muster. He turned the doorknob, and for a second, doubted that it would open. He crossed his fingers and pushed the door. It opened, and he felt like he could finally breathe again.

Immediately, he feels a flush of relief wash over him. His world filled with light again and he wasn’t trapped anymore.  All the people around him disappeared and all he could see was him. His eyes filled with tears as he hugged him.

He was out. He was proud. He wasn’t forced inside a box anymore. He had him and everyone could know now. Everyone should know. He doesn’t ever want to be trapped again.


15 thoughts on “Trapped No More

  1. I just came across your blog and –girl! –It is amazing! I love all your stories (at least the ones I have read, I haven’t got the chance to read all of them yet but I sure every one of them is purely amazing, every last word!). All I can say is wow. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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